For the longest time, my wife was the only one who could reliably rock him to sleep or get him down for a midday nap.
Sometimes, she'd rock him to sleep, carefully slide him onto me, and eventually he'd wake up, look around, and seem confused about how he ended up with the wrong parent 😂
And when my wife wasn't home? Different story.
I'd try to comfort him, and we'd get about 10 minutes of nonstop crying before he'd eventually pass out from exhaustion.
I mean, technically, he was sleeping on me.
I'll take the win, I guess?
10 weeks today my son to finally fall asleep on me without a fuss.
I rocked him to sleep myself.
No handoff from Mom. No crying marathon. No passing out from exhaustion.
He just fell asleep on me.
And stayed asleep.
Honestly, it felt like a huge win over something so small.
Then the next day came.
And apparently, he'd completely forgotten about our little breakthrough.
Back to wanting Mom. Back to me being the entertainment department.
Which, to be fair, is probably how he sees me most of the time anyway.
And that's okay.
He's still learning, growing, and figuring out the world.
My wife and I have different roles in his little world right now, and he has a connection with his mom that I'm not going to compete with.
I'm just happy he's slowly getting more comfortable with me being the one who comforts him, too.
It still doesn't work 90% of the time.
But now there's that one nap I’ll remember to this day.
And tell him stories as he ages.
And I think that's what I'm learning about fatherhood lately.
You don't always get to decide when progress happens. You just have to keep showing up for it.
It's easy to get frustrated when something you keep trying doesn't seem to work.
Patience has been a big one of mine that’s been tested.
You put in the reps, and at times the results don't always show up when you want them to.
That’s okay!
What you can control is whether you show up for the next one.
This week’s Rep:
Next time you're struggling with something as a dad, try to resist the urge to judge your progress too quickly.
Stay present. Be patient. Adjust if you need to.
You don't need to force a breakthrough. You just need to give yourself a chance to get there.
And when that tiny win finally comes?
Take it!
Even if it lasts exactly one nap.
Until the next one dads,
John Guevara
P.S. If you're a dad who's ever felt like the backup parent, you're not alone. What's one small win you've had lately that probably wouldn't mean much to anyone else, but meant a lot to you? Feel free to leave a comment, would love to hear your stories!